necromanswers | Lup | IC Contact Page

[It's a little awkward seeing her looking at him like that, sure. Probably because he's not used to it. And while he is still a little nervous, he does feel a lot calmer than before.

In fact, he's feeling a little bold. While he really wants to do something about his arousal, it does occur to him that Lup has been doing all the work so far. So he reaches to take the bottom part of her shirt, if she lets him.]

.....How about both?

Oho... I can do both.

[She does, in fact, let him; she'll even arch her body to help, dragging the shirt up and over her head, tossing it aside. Her hands leave his body just long enough to reach behind herself to unclasp her bra, discarding it off the side of the table with a smirk. She doesn't have the biggest chest in town, but she's got pretty great tits, if one were to ask her. Maybe it doesn't even matter. He looks like the sort of guy who's never seen any.

She's pleased by his initiative, either way.]

How's that? Worth the trouble, I hope.

Y-yeah.....[And he stares, still flustered, not really used to it. Lup isn't his type of girl but she definitely does have an attractive figure and well....at least he says that, considering his limited interaction with women in this manner (meaning no interaction of the sort at all).

And he catches himself.] Uh - scuse me. [H-he....should probably continue. He tries to see if he can get out from under her and start taking his pants and boxers off. That's probably the best course of action, right? He thinks, anyway.]

[After 300 years, that still never stops being satisfying. She grins, recognizing one more victory, but as he starts to fuss with the rest of his clothes she leans in closer, her hand on his chest to nudge him back to looking up at her.]

Cloud, hon, I'd ride you like a train on the floor if you brought those secret abs along, but I've got an excellent bed upstairs with our names on it. What do you say?

Huh? [He is fiddling with his pants when she brings his attention. He kind of....assumed they were going to fuck right here when she noticed his erection and offered to remove her shirt, but.....a bed would probably be more comfortable. A lot more.] Uh.....sure.

[Although the idea of being railed on the floor arouses him further but.....maybe another time. Removing his hands from his pants, trying to ignore how tight they are and trying to push himself up...] Where is it?

No fear. I'll get us there.

[She closes her eyes for a moment, spreading her palms out on his chest and murmuring an incantation. There's a subtle vibration that ripples through the table (feels nice, actually) and suddenly the surface they're on becomes a portal, through which they fall. The drop is really only a few inches, her aim practiced and precise, and they fall right onto a large, plush bed, four posters, the colours dark and inviting. Magic houses are the best.

She had the sense to lift up before they dropped, so she didn't land uncomfortably on him. She's quick to reposition herself, giving a weighty grind of her body on his to help avoid the teleportation killing his vibe.]

It's up here... and so are we. [She reaches out to take his hands, guiding them towards his pants.] You wanna show me what you've got, soldier?

Get us - huh?! [Wait, what what is she doing? And why is this vibration? It feels good but -

Despite the few inches, he yelps as he tumbles onto the bed, although from the shock of it happening, not pain. He looks around.....did she.....just teleport him to the bed?

She's grinding on him again and encouraging him to remove his pants and while he's dying to do that, he can't help but ask, if in a breathy voice.]

We're....still in the same dimension, right? [So she doesn't have to teleport him back to get the rest of his gear later, does he?]

Edited 2021-10-23 19:08 (UTC)

[She grins down at him, shifting backwards to give him some space to undress. She's got her own shorts to deal with, herself.]

Same dimension as the house we started in, yeah. I just took us up one floor. We're not drunks at the bar, we don't have to fuck in a bathroom.

[It may have been an intensely cushy massage-table-spa area but... it was still very much a bathroom.]

......Guess you have a point. [That sound be weird now she words it like that. But....well, at least it's the same dimension. Not another one where others are around and can hear.

It's still weird but then he never thought his first time was going to be in pocket dimension anyway. When Lup gives him space to move, Cloud works on his pants, pulling them down along with his boxers, freeing his length, before kicking the rest of his clothes onto the floor.

When he's finished, he slowly turns to see if Lup has finished. Or is she going to stare at him and make him blush again? He doesn't have a 'big sword' as she put it earlier - it's pretty average. His arousal is still very obvious though.]

[She's not staring, if that helps him any. She's been around long enough to know that size matters very little, in the grand scheme of things, and she's kind of small herself, so 'big swords' don't guarantee a good time for her. Considering it's his first time, she's going to cut his performance a little slack either way. She gives it a once-over when he's freed himself, more interested in his continued arousal than how big he is, but her focus is on his expression.

She's also taken care of the rest of her clothes, so when he turns towards her, he'll find her naked, seated beside him uncovered and unashamed. Her hair is undone, spilling over her shoulders in waves that do little to conceal her nakedness. She leans back, pointedly showing off, and curls her fingers in the bedspread between them.]

I have one question... and one request. Question, first: do you wanna lie back and have me take care of you, or would you rather be in charge of how this goes?

[She can totally put him down and ride him like a pro, that's no issue for her. But she's very familiar with how important people can view their firsts; humans, especially, who live a short enough time to remember this sort of thing clearly. He seems like the type who would care, and just because he'd opted not to wait for some sort of love match doesn't mean it won't matter later. A man should be in control of his destiny, when it's to become a lifetime memory. She'd like for him to remember it for the right reasons. Position, and control, are important.]

[He's relieved she's not staring at him. But....the next question makes him stop. To be honest he would have been fine with either. But the way she worded it sounded serious. As if.....he should think about it carefully, considering it is his first time.

And not with someone more special. Except.....he wasn't sure if anyone more special would have wanted to lie with him anyway. Tifa......he sometimes wondered if he felt that way, no, still feels that way. But thinking about her and what might have happened to her hurt a lot. And besides, he was sure she didn't feel the same. Especially after the number of times he failed her. Back on the mountain, back in Nibelheim, back when she disappeared....

No, he had to get her out of his mind! It wasn't as if he had a chance, anyway. To be honest, he was never sure he'd get this far with someone even for a casual hook-up. Sure, Jessie seemed to be interested and that did get on his nerves a little although he wasn't sure what would have happened if she had survived and he had come over to her house..

He didn't want to think about Jessie either. Otherwise he'd have to think about how his friend lay there dying. When he should have gotten there in time.

He realises that his hands are curled up at his sides and shaking. Ugh, he has to stop. He came here in part to get away not think about his failures, not dwell on them further. He has to give some sort of answer and hope that Lup would not notice.]

I.....guess it doesn't matter one way or the other. The life I lead........I don't know if I could live past tomorrow or die. Or go back home and die soon after. Either from battle or from....[He stops, looking very uneasy. He remembered President Shinra talking about cell degradation......something that he should know. And yet when he tried to remember, he came up with nothing.

And yet all SOLDIERs knew it, so so should he, right? And yet....when he heard it back then, it made him confused and fearful, something he quickly managed to cover up.]

[That... is not the sort of response she'd been expecting, not from a question that at its core is simply asking about a sexual position. He looks as if she'd just asked him to share the story of how his dog died or something. Maybe he's trying to be subtle with it, but he's really not. She can read faces well, and even if his expression didn't give him away, the way he's trembling would.

The trauma that soldiers often carry, she wonders? So ingrained that even the choice of how to fuck someone is one that is perhaps undeserving or muddled in his eyes? This isn't love, so it isn't lovemaking. Nothing in this room will matter past the doors as they exit, unless they choose to let it matter. This... makes it seem like it would matter quite a lot, for reasons he hasn't yet shared.

Either way, it can't continue like this. She's not opposed to morbid commentary even during sex - she's a goddamn undead who dated a necromancer for over 50 years, that isn't the issue - but she's not here to force anyone into anything. If he's reluctant or making her choose for him, then he's not ready to commit, no matter what he says.

She reaches up a hand to gently touch his cheek, turning him towards her and urging his chin up.]

Your choices are always going to matter. Even if you die tomorrow, today is still yours. Life is in the choices you make, Cloud. [Her voice softens, smiling faintly.] You can choose to stop.

[His guarded look drops again once she turns him towards her.] Wh.....what do you mean...?

[Choose to stop? It's not as if he said no.

And yet......he really didn't think much about how he wanted it to go, besides not wanting to screw up and wanting to forget all his problems. However, in spite all of this, his problems have come right to the surface again. And while he tried to hide it from her, he obviously did not do a very good job. Otherwise she wouldn't be telling him this, looking at him kindly.

She doesn't think he's up for this, does she? And Cloud has the sinking feeling that she might have a point.

He glances down at the bed, his eyes fixed there, face overcome with guilt and disappointment.] ......No, never mind. You're right.

[Yeah, she figured that was the case. Disappointing, but she can't blame him; they'd rushed in on impulse, and sometimes it works out well, sometimes it doesn't. This isn't her first one-night stand. This isn't her first one-night stand to end up not being about sex.]

It's alright, don't look so bummed. [She gives his cheek a light pat, brushing her hand gently through his hair. For all the spikes, it's softer than it looks.] It'd feel worse for us both if you realized it after we did it. ...Or during. Gods, it's bad when it happens during. I once had a fella start bawling into my hair because his sister wore the same shampoo or something. I thought I was gonna die that night. Balls deep! Thinking about his sister! Who does that?

[She's hoping a bit of levity will help him relax. He doesn't need sex, he needs to let himself think properly. Hard to do that when you're kicking yourself so low.]

[Cloud continues to stare down, looking ashamed. For fuck's sake, what is the matter with him? Tony said that he thought he had some scars. And the guy clearly didn't mean the physical type. Which Cloud thought that he would been able to resist getting, having been a SOLDIER.

.....Not that being a SOLDIER made a difference. He still reacted badly to things, had headaches, had terrible nights, uncovered memories he didn't understand and was scared of. And was unable to even have casual sex, apparently.

And yet for some reason, Lup didn't seem to be angry. Not outwardly, anyway. She's even gently patting his cheek and brushing through his hair. Trying to cheer him up, giving him an anecdote to tell him that it could be worse. Still, for him to say he'd be up for a one night stand and then this happened, she must be really pissed off, he's sure of it.

Still looking gloomy, he mumbles.] ......Sorry. I really must have wasted your time.

Edited (Forgot to put warning up. ) 2021-10-24 21:36 (UTC)

[Aw, shit. Even the wacky anecdote didn't help? Not even the tiniest smile? It's worse than she thought.

She considers him for a long moment, debating how to handle this, then rises from the bed, still naked but unbothered about it as she moves. Not like he hasn't already seen her. Crossing the room to a small door at the side, she fetches two robes from the closet, returning to the bed with one that'll fit him, which she sets in his lap, and drawing the other around herself before she climbs back up to sit next to him.]

Don't call it a waste. No one got hurt, and you learned something about yourself. [She leans back against the pillows, watching his expression.] You shouldn't keep it to yourself, though. That's not healthy.

[He might have found the story a bit amusing if he was in a better mood.

Cloud barely registers that Lup has got up until he is surprised to find a robe on his lap. Ah....of course. Even though sex is off the table, he’s still naked. And while any awkwardness he previously had is gone, considering Lup has seen everything anyway, it might get a bit weird just sitting there without something on. So he takes the robe and fastens it around himself before settling back down.

He learnt something about himself, well sure, but it wasn’t anything good. Although finding out during the act and maybe ending up like that guy she mentioned might have probably been worse, so maybe there is something good there. As for the other thing she said....] I dunno who I’d tell, especially about something like that.

Edited 2021-10-25 20:46 (UTC)

[She can't tell if it's more charming that he's thick or not so presumptuous to assume she'd been making a subtle offer. Ah, well. She prefers being blunt, anyway.]

You were about two steps away from being inside me, [is her answer, in a dry but soft tone still.] You could let me inside your head a little. I'll listen.

[Not exactly the sort of night she'd been anticipating, but she's always open to life swerving into a strange direction. Truth is, his comment was worrisome. She wouldn't feel comfortable kicking him out without a conversation, just because he's not going to bone her.]

[Oh.....right. She meant he should talk to her. But....they don’t know each other well, do they? Even though in just an hour or however long since it was when they left the cafe she’s seen a lot of him already, arguably.

Besides, he’s not sure how much Lup is ok with this situation being disclosed to someone else. Sure, he vaguely remembers her making a public post saying she’s ok for casual sex but that is not the same as saying being open about with who and where and the circumstances of what happened. And he wouldn’t know what to tell with the people he knows better anyway.

He glances down again while moving his knees to his chest, as if for security.]

I.....dunno what happened. I came here to forget about a bunch of crap. And then.....when you asked me that question, all that crap somehow came up again. And......you know the rest.

Edited 2021-10-26 11:49 (UTC)

[She keeps a polite distance while sitting beside him, with the bed large enough to give them both space. A stark contrast to when they'd made an agreement and she'd been shamelessly handsy. It's good to know where things stand, and his retraction would be message enough if the rest hadn't already been so.

She figures he's not going to be too up-front about his worries, so she takes advantage of her blunt nature to just rip the bandaid off.]

Why do you think you might die soon?

[Wait what is she taking about? He didn’t say that....well, apart from possibly dying in battle and-

Oh.

No, when he remembered President Shinra’s words and trailed off. His instinct is to try and cover it up. There must be some way to brush it off.

.....

Actually, maybe not. He gets the impression that Lup will smell a rat. And yet he is worried about how he is going to come across if he says the truth.

Somehow, however, he finds himself talking anyway. He’s not sure if it’s because he’s worn out or he thinks that she’d call him out if he lies anyway. And....flirtiness and what almost happened aside, she has been pretty nice to him.]

I.....don’t know. I’m really sorry, I don’t. I feel it’s something I should but.........I don’t really remember. [And this is the first time he’s fully admitted this to anyone. And to a near stranger, which astonishes him even more, but.] There’s a lot of stuff that I don’t remember. And I don’t know why.

So it's more like... a feeling? Or a fear you're carrying around?

[Maybe a little of both. Fear of death isn't a rational thing; she's felt it herself, of course, even during the century where she'd become effectively immortal and would be revived conveniently when the year reset. It didn't mean she wasn't afraid of leaving those she loved alone for that time, or being alone if they died and left her. There were bad years, when something hit her and she woke up from the void of nothing months later to the relieved embraces of her family. After she became a lich, some of that fear went away, but some aspects of it will always linger. And then she had died, what she thought was the last time. She'd been scared, then.]

How long have you felt like that, do you remember that?

It’s not so much the fear of dying. [His job involves killing things. He’d have to be aware of that. That being said, dying from whatever this cell thing is rather than in battle would suck.

As for whether he remembers, well, he wonders if it’s going to sound ridiculous, which is why he hesitates.] Well......it’s something I knew when I was in SOLDIER.....[He has this sudden look of great unease.] I....think.....[But that has to be the case! President Shinra said that every SOLDIER knew it.

And yet why doesn’t he?]

You're not sure?

[She tries to coax him gently, but she can't help feeling confused by... well, his confusion. He's worried about something he doesn't know is true?]

[Ugh. She must really think there is something wrong with him. And he's not sure how he can explain it without her questioning him further.

He sits there for a while, thinking about how to word it before slowly and awkwardly speaking again.]

Members of SOLDIER.....they get exposed to mako when they get accepted. Gives them the strength and fighting abilities most humans don't have. But you can't give that amount of mako to just anyone - it's pretty dangerous and you have to be really tough. Not just be good at combat but also have the mentality to tolerate that sort of stuff.

But it's not just that, it's.....[He pauses again, feeling very unsure of what he is about to say before continuing.].........there's something....cell degradation. Apparently it kills more SOLDIERS than anything else.

I was told about it.....I mean.......reminded of it not long before I came here. [Because that must have happened, right?] By someone who would definitely know about that sort of thing. [To some extent anyway. But while President Shinra is the scum of the earth, it would be a very weird thing to lie about.]

Lup | IC Contact Page | Hugtopia

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cw: mental trauma

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